Why God Never Received Tenure
- 1. He had only one major publication.
- 2. It was in Hebrew.
- 3. It had no references.
- 4. It wasn't published in any referenced journal.
- 5. Some even doubt He wrote it himself.
- 6. It may be true He created the world, but what has He done since then?
- 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
- 8. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating His results.
- 9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human
subjects.
- 10. When an experiment failed, He tried to cover it up by drowning the
subjects.
- 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, He deleted them from the
sample.
- 12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book.
- 13. Some say He had His son teach the class.
- 14. He expelled his first two students for learning on their own.
- 15. Though there were only ten requirements, most students failed his tests.
- 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually were held in the middle of
nowhere.
Web page spun on 7 December 1999 by
Peter
B Gilkey 202 Deady Hall,
Department of Mathematics
at the
University of Oregon, Eugene OR 97403-1222, U.S.A.
Phone 1-541-346-4717
Email:peter.gilkey.cc.67@aya.yale.edu
of
Deady Spider Enterprises